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Monday, February 21, 2005
mur so.... semi-update of sorts I suppose... I've since transferred to the front desk so now I am your friendly hotel clerk getting paid about a dollar more an hour, am now guaranteed my full 40 hours and usually a lil extra, and I get to sit on my ass for 8 hours at a time hehe... In other non work-related news, I went to a rave. I had a blast. While I was there I ended up attempting to flirt with this girl there, which ended up in slight embarassment a much of my attempted flirting does... I had seen her outside having a cigarette before and was caught by her eyes immediately. I sort of sought her out after that and ended up finding her spinning glowsticks from long strings, I was just kind of magnatized there staring at her until they ended up getting tangled. After semi watching her and semi going off and dancing for about 20-30 mins I walked up with my courage in my throat and meaning well asked "do you need nails?" and I showed her my nails which I have recently gotten done so they are longer than I've ever had them, I know, weird (or as kelly put it "how is any one going to know you're a dyke if you have your nails done???"). Anywho, so she stares at me in utter bewilderment and I scamper off embarassed. Later I was outside in the smoking area kind of in the corner just people watching, and she glances over at me saying how sad I looked over there in the corner all by myself and that I should go over and talk to her and her friends. She introduces me to everyone and we bull shit for a while, then she says "it was really weird, this chick just comes up to me out of nowhere and asks 'do you need nails'?" I timidly admit that yeah, that was me, she didn't have a clue what i was talking about, we all laughed about it, and have laughed a bit since then about it still heh... well she gives me her number, i get hers, and long story short we've spent nearly every night since on the phone for at least an hour sometimes as much as 4 hours on the phone with eachother. We've hung out once on friday, I had a good time but had to go home early to watch grandma. So... I'm interested in this girl. I have NO intention of rushing things at all. She says she may or may not be moving to Walla Walla, WA in two months but nothing is set in stone and she made sure to reinforce this in my brain a few thousand times while telling me about it.. hm? I would like to see if this could go somewhere. She throws me off balance like no other. Every other time i've been interested in someone I haven't been scared at all, granted my intuition was politely prodding me from the back of my head telling me to run away but did I ever listen once? well no such prodding exists here, fortunately, but unfortunately because i subconsciously knew that those endeavors weren't going anywhere there was never any real fear. Don't get me wrong, I've been hurt, there's been pain, but there's never been any initial fear of rejection. I was fine with whatever happened, whether the feelings were mutual or not I would be ok... So I decided tonight after she told me this that I want to take her out. Let her know I'm serious without putting any pressure on the situation. So I get home and my sister M is there, I ask her if she knows of any websites or anything with upcoming events like concerts and whatnot in the area, because I have someone I'd like to take out but I'm not sure to what yet. She tells me that she has two tickets each for the symphony on thursday and orchestra on friday and would I be interested... well i nearly shit a brick because the girl... K likes classical music apparently.... !!!! so now I'm just trying to figure out where to take her to dinner beforehand... I've never done anything like this before. I've been on your average movie and pizza type date but nothing like dinner and the orchestra before. I've never had anyone take me to something like that and with the exception of one person I've never felt the need to... I don't want to say impress... or even convince.. I'm not sure what word I'm looking for here.. but i've never really felt the need to do something special. maybe impress and convince are the right words just not in the context of where i was initially intending that word.. i don't want to impress her with money or convince her i'm worth getting to know by taking her out, but maybe impress upon her the idea, convince her that i'm not a flake, that i really am interested in her, and that i mean business. Hmmm..... Well I have definetely gotten to the point where this is considered a rant so I'm gonna stop but any suggestions, critisisms, comments, words of encouragment, advice.. whatever.. talk to me people! I know it's been a while since I wrote in here, i've been so busy, but I really would like to hear someone else talk about this besides me hehe...
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PROFILE
 TAG BOARD CALENDAR
LINKS     
 Music is passionate love  Tank girl is bad-ass mother-fucker love  To be a lesbian is to be in love.  Feet are love  Jones Soda is bubbly love  C.S.I. is graphic love  Janis Joplin is beautiful talented love
 You may say I'm a dreamer, but I'm not the only one...  Capricorn is Ambitious Love  Alyson Hannigan is Why Can't You Be A Lesbian? love.  Fight Club is chaotic love  Chuck Palahniuk is psychological love   CONTACT CREDITS
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